Penny Jar

Put a twenty in an unmarked envelope and leave it in the mailbox of someone who needs it. (this suggestion in beloved memory of my step-dad, the King of the Anonymous 20.)

 Hand-paint your friends’ names on coffee mugs and hang them on the wall for their next visit. They’ll love the feeling that they have worth and “a place” in your home.

If you see a poor family having a garage sale, especially near the end of the month, root through your possessions and give them some to sell. When they try to give you your money at the end of the day, refuse to take it, saying that they did you a favour by getting rid of your junk. If there’s stuff left over that they like, let them keep it.

If you see tools on sale, BUY THEM! That way, the guy who’s always borrowing your tools and never returning them can just keep them (he obviously needs them anyway, right?) without any resentment on your part. If he comes back with them someday, you can just tell him that the tool was an extra and you don’t need it.

Save the seeds from your garden and give half to your friends. That way, you can all share the same “friendship gardens” next year… and make sure that everyone has fresh food on the table.

If you have to buy little things for a friend’s new baby, go down to the hospital and buy them from their gift shop. The clothes are beautiful, and usually hand-knit by volunteers or older people donating to local causes.

If you have a big container full of herbs that you are bringing inside for the fall, divide them and put the plants into two windowboxes… one for you, one for a friend that needs herbs but can’t afford them.

If you have a humongous back yard, please consider sectioning part of it off to be a communal garden for the poor in your neighbourhood. If you provide anything for it, like compost, watering, or seeds, so much the better.

If you notice that someone has just moved into the neighbourhood, leave a care package outside their door… something like a plant for the house with a gift certificate to the local kitchenware store, with a list of things like what day garbage pickup is, hours of operation for the local grocery stores, bus schedules, etc. Don’t forget a card with your name and address on it, with an invitation to come to tea! And a friendly homecooked meal is always welcome too, especially if the kitchen hasn’t been unpacked yet!

Hold a block garage sale and pool the money to improve your neighbourhood in some way… more trees, some new playground equipment for the park, or just to help out a poor family that is down on their luck.

If you have a neighbour who is experiencing weight problems, be their diet buddy. Weigh in together every day, keep a food diary, and eat at least one meal a day together (preferably at the time when your neighbour has difficulty with snacking). A lot of people overeat because they feel lonely. Your support could make all the difference!

If you know of someone who is going through a particularly hard time, especially a divorce, send them an anonymous admirer card. It doesn’t need to be romantic – just encouraging. Make sure it’s not written, or they might recognize your handwriting!

If you have to go to a laundromat to wash your clothes, consider going with a friend. You can share the expenses for soap and clothes freshener, as well as help each other carry and fold the clothes. Just having someone to talk to while waiting for the cycles to end is worth the effort!

If you crochet, make up a big bag of motifs. That way you’ll have a headstart on making blankets for new babies, afghans for someone who needs a little comfort, or tablecloths and placemats for people just getting married. Be prepared for every occasion!

If you and a couple of friends are trying to lose weight, why not start an informal walkers club to go enjoy the golden hours of sunrise together? You can all take turns going to each others’ houses for a healthy breakfast, later. Weight is always easier to lose with other people!

Pick up the litter on your way. You don’t have to run all over the park, or pick up every gum wrapper on the street, but just take a bag and some tongs with you when you go out for a walk, and pick up enough to fill one bag. That’s one bag less that people have to kick through and step on everyday. Believe me, it makes a difference!

Always cook double. It doesn’t take that much extra effort, and there’s always someone who could really benefit from a hot homecooked meal… the two-job family, the lonely elder or the new mother, for example. If you can’t find anyone to give your food to, just stick it in the freezer… and consider it a job well done that you’ve saved yourself some cooking on another day!

If you are going to buy medicine for you or your child, buy two. I dunno how many times my neighbours have come over unexpectedly asking if i have something simple like a fever reducer or arthritis painkiller and have been incredibly grateful when this small thing was there!

Go out every morning to make the rounds of your neighbours, if you have the time. It doesn’t need to be too involved; just a friendly ‘hello, i was just passing by your door and thought i would invite you for a walk’ is good enough. Make sure that you know your neighbours well enough to know when someone needs an extra twenty, a jacket for the baby, a visit in the hospital or just a shoulder to cry on when things get tough.

Carry referral cards for your favourite dentist, doctor, community nurse or chiropractor. If you talk to other people at all about their health, chances are that you’ll be handing out at least one of those cards a day to them. Everybody’s looking for good medical care! Make sure you follow up by finding out how they are later.

If you know of a family that comes from a war-torn country, make discreet enquiries as to how their families back home could be helped. They will know, better than any international aid organization, what is needed and where.

When you water your lawn/garden, water your neighbour’s as well. (if they don’t mind)
It only takes a few minutes, and leaves both of your lawns looking good.

Never pass up the opportunity to teach something, even if it is only how to bake cookies to the toddler who wants to help, or how to change engine oil to an interested neighbour. It’s funny how quickly your knowhow gets passed on to others, and others after that! There is no measure for how much a small act of goodness can multiply throughout the world.

Casually mention to that two-job family that you like to mend clothes, if you’re handy with that sort of thing. This always gets neglected, and being as appearances do count for something and clothes are so expensive these days, a quick little stitch in time could do a lot of good.

If you live on a rural route, arrange with your neighbour to pick up his mail at the post office when you drive down into town to get yours. No sense rattling down in two cars to get one handful of mail!

If you hear someone gossiping badly about a mutual acquaintance, quickly counter with all the times that acquaintance has spoken well of the gossiper. You could head off a nasty misunderstanding before it gets into a major conflict.

Weed somebody’s garden. Weeds come up so quickly and take over the garden in a matter of days if they’re not taken care of. Monitoring is difficult for people who have to work or have health problems. Make sure you don’t take out their flowers in your efforts to separate the garden from the wilderness!

If you have a pickup or van, make sure you offer your (free) moving services to others at the end of the month. This will alleviate an incredible amount of worry for a poor family and doesn’t take much time out of your day.

Paint the jaded park playground equipment early in the morning. Make sure you leave a ‘wet paint’ sign out to protect your work and keep other people from ruining their clothes etc.

You know all those people who go out walking the sands to find some keepsake to bring home? Give them something worthwhile to find… a note in a bottle, some (bought) whelks, small geodes etc. Be creative! This is something you could do everyday while you take your own walk along the shores.

If you happen to have a bit of money, go to pawnshops and buy up a couple of gold rings, or get some cubic zirconium rings. They’re surprisingly cheap! Arrange with the local justice of the peace etc. to make them available to young couples who can’t afford a ring when they get married. Your gift will be treasured for a lifetime, and perhaps even become a family heirloom!  

Take every opportunity you can get to speak well of others, gently and thoughtfully. This is especially rewarding if you can speak well of your enemies. Spread a good rumour of someone’s kindness, intelligence, and efficiency.

If you have a neighbour who has a huge stereo system and insists on using it to the max despite gentle suggestions to the contrary, leave little bags of earplugs and analgesic on the doorknobs of all the people affected by this noise.

If you have a worthy but poor friend, do invite them out for coffee and pick up the tab frequently. Sometimes it’s their only chance to get out and socialize. I had a friend who did this for me, for upwards of ten years (many thanks, Gregg!) and their kindness has never been forgotten.

If you know someone who is moving, take some old boxes over. If you stay to help fill them, so much the better. If you are an old friend, packing up someone’s life and helping them on their way can be a good way to overcome the grief of their leaving.

If you know how to cut hair (well!), offer your services to neighbours and friends for free. Just cutting kids hair is a big favour for a lot of parents who can’t afford the high prices at barbershops/salons but still need to get their kids off to school looking good.

If you have ever had to sit in a ward for the terminally ill, waiting by the bedside of someone who is passing away, you know how difficult it can be to keep your spirits up. Most of us leave such places as quickly as possible after the crisis is over, but I would suggest going back to help family members who are in the same situation you once were in. Become a volunteer for your local hospital.

If someone you know has had a loved one pass away, take care of the daily mundanities like cooking and cleaning and dressing babies for them for awhile; just until they’re back on their feet and can take care of themselves and their families again.

If you know of someone with a new baby, slip them a box of diapers once in a while. Those things are expensive, and babies go through them very quickly!

If you have two bags of rice, make sure your neighbour gets one.

If you have a decent computer, share the wealth. Teach others to use it and allow them to create email accounts etc. on your pc. A lot of people are getting left behind because they lack the time or money to get a pc or go to classes to find out how they work.

If you have a few friends with half-finished projects in chaotic craft spaces, make a club to sit down together and make sense of all the things they’ve started. Sometimes it just takes another pair of eyes looking at something to overcome the trepidation of finishing it. If you have beef bones left over from your meal, why not take them to the dog next door?

If you are visiting a proud friend and discover that they are in financial difficulties, don’t waste time asking them if they need money. You know what they’ll say. Just tuck a bit of money somewhere you know they’ll find it… my favourite is the bathroom because you just have to excuse yourself and then put a twenty in the medicine cabinet. Express disbelief when they tell you of their find. A bag of groceries on the door wouldn’t hurt, either!

If you know that your neighbour down the street is sick, you know, the one you always nod to but don’t really know, don’t lose the chance to know them better! Make out a homemade card expressing sympathy for their illness and put it in their mailbox. If you’re feeling brave, knock on their door with a fresh pot of chicken soup!

If your neighbour’s air conditioning breaks down, right in the middle of the worst heatwave the city has ever seen, leave a bag of homemade paper fans on the door. It may not be as good as their regular air conditioning, but it couldn’t hurt!!

Forgive somebody. If someone owes you money, either write it off or make it easy to pay back, e.g. cut it in half and tell them to pay 10. a month.

As for that grudge you’ve been harbouring for the last twenty years, remember that life is short. You may not have an extra minute to forgive; and you could both go to the grave with hate on your soul. A scary thought, isn’t it? Show yourself to be the bigger hearted; have the strength of character to reach for the phone first.

Don’t forget: Forgiving is hard work. It’s not for wusses.

Going out for a morning jog? Don’t lose this opportunity to do good deeds! Pack up a few goodies in plastic bags and leave them hanging on your neighbour’s doorknobs. Suggestions: freshly-baked bread or cookies, a good book you know they’ll enjoy, toys for the kids, you get the idea…! 

Take out your neighbour’s garbage when you’re taking out your own. Take the cans/bins back at the end of the day, when you’re taking your own back. Make this a habit, particularly if your neighbours are handicapped in some way.

Do you have a friend who is down? Why not buy them a faceted crystal for their window? It may not cure depression, but it’s just so much harder to be sad when you have a hundred or so rainbows running about the room!

On recycle garbage day, take a walk around the block and put out all the recycle boxes that got forgotten. At the end of the day, take another walk and put them all back. Your neighbours will probably be wondering how their boxes walked to the curb and back!

If you know that a poor friend of yours needs something but is too proud to take it, trade! Ask for something to finish off your stamp collection, or help you broom up those old leaves, or feed your pets, something that won’t take any effort for them to part with. Then offer the thing they need in return.

Pull your kids off the Nintendo and instill a sense of kindness in them by enlisting their help in packaging food and clothing for anonymous giving to needy neighbours. 

Extend your neighbourhood and start a penpal club. Be brave… choose your penpals from countries that are wartorn or suffering from catastrophes.